Who I'm Jealous Of

Here's who I'm jealous of right now:

• Dudes that can grow those big, thick, furry beards.  I'm talking about when you can't tell if it's a bear rug strapped to their face or not. I happen to be blessed with a distinct lack of body hair.  Most days I'm thankful for that physical trait passed to me by my Father.  But every once in a while I'd like to be able to grow out a pelt on my cheeks and chin that would make a French trapper proud.  When I do go a few days without shaving my face looks like it's having a bad reaction to prescription meds.  The whiskers grow in random patches and you can measure the distance between the individual folicles with a wooden ruler.  So yeah, I can't even do stubble very well.
• Bloggers that can readily think of that crucial second point in any list of three things.
• That guy that reviews movies for Focus on the Family.  Have you heard of this guy? He can be found here: http://www.pluggedin.com/movies.aspx  I always feel a little guilty when I get a movie, start watching it, see some horribly violent or salacious scene, and think, "Well, I hope the kids don't walk in about now."  At Plugged In they go ahead and watch all these movies with the express purpose of warning me that there are scenes like that.  Evidently the rating information isn't enough. Hmm.  I'm going to start a website where, as a Christian, I review alcoholic beverages and strip clubs so that I can, you know, warn people not to do that.

I watched There Will Be Blood last night. My wife didn't want to watch because she heard it was too violent.  It was rated R "For some violence".  Well, there was a fight or too, and then one fellow got shot. Most of the violence involves terrible derrick accidents.  No nudity, hardly any language.  I didn't quite finish the movie last night. There were about 15 minutes left, so I thought I'd finish this morning.  I started it, and then my daughter got out of bed and came down and sat on my lap. We watched as Daniel Day-Lewis told that other guy that he drinks his milkshake.  Then, Daniel (also his name in the movie), without any warning, clubs him to death with a bowling pin.  I tried to cover my daughter's eyes, but she wouldn't have it.  As the blood spread over the bowling alley, my daughter remarks, "Now he's in trouble."  I wish someone would've told me they saved the most violent act for the end.

I know it's wrong to be jealous, but sometimes I can't help it.