Our president authorized federal funding for embryonic stem cell research (escr) today. Oh, that is just wonderful! I'll be looking for the cure to my dermatillamania next week.
Think of it! Escr holds so much promise that even though it's been legal for private companies to conduct it, they have demurred, saying, "No, it's too important for us to do, we'll wait for the gov't to fund it, so they can have the glory"! That's a direct quote (more or less).
It must suck to have a serious disease. I am thankful I do not have that cross to bear. But if I did, would I advocate destroying life to potentially cure my disease? God I hope not. It's impossible for me to really know what it's like to live with a debilitating disease, so I can't stand in judgement, but somewhere along the way I have to accept that I'm going to die of my last ailment.
So we have to cut our losses somewhere. Sure, maybe experimenting on 10 year old children would lead to all kinds of advances and cures and life would be wonderful, no disease, no pain, no suffering, yet, somehow, I still think we'd end up dying. Where would it leave us? Living a few more extra years here, which is a minute fraction of eternity, after hurting, injuring, and destroying something else.
Is escr necessary? Aren't they making advances with adult stem cells? Why aren't the big evil pharmaceutical companies studying embryonic stem cells if there is so much potential (oh, wait, they want us to be sick so we have to buy drugs). Where does life begin? I'm not sure, but I'm not going to take any chances.
Oh, and yes, I do believe people ought to think about what they're doing before a bunch of eggs are fertilized without being spoken for.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
New Pants
They say there's no problem common to the human condition that can't be solved by a well- placed, well-timed, high explosive. Well, I think there is no problem that a man will face that can't be alleviated by a well-pressed, well-fitted, comfortable pair of slacks.
A man can do nothing better for himself than find a pair of slacks that are truly magnificent. Just to be clear, jeans are not what we have in mind. There's a reason they won't let you wear dungarees to the office, and there's a reason the ladies are always kvetching, "I wish we could wear jeans, at least on Fridays." No sir, denim, as useful as it may be, especially when it comes to sailing ships, does not make a fine pair of slacks.
Good things happen when you wear slacks. I spent most of my high school years wearing jeans and cannot think of even one really great thing that happened, save one. I met my wife in high school, but the night I met her, I was wearing slacks! I got married in slacks. Any job I ever really wanted I got while wearing slacks. The best shrimp alfredo I ever ate I enjoyed while wearing a pair of gray, flannel, flat front slacks.
Think about it, the men you admire the most always wear slacks: James Bond, Abraham Lincoln, William Wallace. OK, Wallace may not have worn slacks, but he didn't wear jeans either. They're not 'dress-up pants' or 'church pants,' they're just slacks, but they will change your world.
If you needed any more proof that slacks are essential it's that a good pair is so hard to find. More on that in another entry. Also, though the word slacks denotes a single unit of clothing, you treat it like it's plural, both with an 's' at the end and using the second-person plural. (Sure, the other pieces of clothing you wear below the waist to cover your legs, even half way down, follows that rule, but still.)
Well, if you'll excuse me, I need to go iron some slacks. This is not a domestic chore you can trust with your wife. As skilled as she might be with your shirts, you'd better let mamasan do your slacks, or else do them yourself.
A man can do nothing better for himself than find a pair of slacks that are truly magnificent. Just to be clear, jeans are not what we have in mind. There's a reason they won't let you wear dungarees to the office, and there's a reason the ladies are always kvetching, "I wish we could wear jeans, at least on Fridays." No sir, denim, as useful as it may be, especially when it comes to sailing ships, does not make a fine pair of slacks.
Good things happen when you wear slacks. I spent most of my high school years wearing jeans and cannot think of even one really great thing that happened, save one. I met my wife in high school, but the night I met her, I was wearing slacks! I got married in slacks. Any job I ever really wanted I got while wearing slacks. The best shrimp alfredo I ever ate I enjoyed while wearing a pair of gray, flannel, flat front slacks.
Think about it, the men you admire the most always wear slacks: James Bond, Abraham Lincoln, William Wallace. OK, Wallace may not have worn slacks, but he didn't wear jeans either. They're not 'dress-up pants' or 'church pants,' they're just slacks, but they will change your world.
If you needed any more proof that slacks are essential it's that a good pair is so hard to find. More on that in another entry. Also, though the word slacks denotes a single unit of clothing, you treat it like it's plural, both with an 's' at the end and using the second-person plural. (Sure, the other pieces of clothing you wear below the waist to cover your legs, even half way down, follows that rule, but still.)
Well, if you'll excuse me, I need to go iron some slacks. This is not a domestic chore you can trust with your wife. As skilled as she might be with your shirts, you'd better let mamasan do your slacks, or else do them yourself.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Prison Break
Despite the title, I've never seen the show Prison Break, not even one episode. I'm sure it's a great show, though.
Have you ever seen a movie that begins with the protagonist, after what you assume has been years behind bars, walking out of prison? I'm thinking The Getaway here, or any other number of movies. Whenever I see that scene I think, "Man, what a great feeling that must be!" Can you imagine? Getting out of prison, and having the rest of your day free! There is not much that can beat that, I bet.
We spend a lot of time and energy, and money, trying to have a truly great experience. I went on a vacation a few months ago that I thought would be pretty great, and honestly it was, but I still don't think it would compare to that day you get out of prison. Maybe it's that whole freedom thing. Being locked up and getting sprung. I think that scene in The Shawshank Redemption, though he isn't released per se, may demonstrate it well. Once he craws out of the sewer and stands there, arms outstretched in the rain, there he knows freedom once again.
There is one experience that may rival getting out of prison. Being convicted, but getting some kind of reprieve and not having to go. Now that would be amazing. I can't imagine the relief a person would feel.
So, the only way I know to experience all this would be to get convicted and sent up the river. I'm just not sure what crime to commit. I may need some legal advice.
Have you ever seen a movie that begins with the protagonist, after what you assume has been years behind bars, walking out of prison? I'm thinking The Getaway here, or any other number of movies. Whenever I see that scene I think, "Man, what a great feeling that must be!" Can you imagine? Getting out of prison, and having the rest of your day free! There is not much that can beat that, I bet.
We spend a lot of time and energy, and money, trying to have a truly great experience. I went on a vacation a few months ago that I thought would be pretty great, and honestly it was, but I still don't think it would compare to that day you get out of prison. Maybe it's that whole freedom thing. Being locked up and getting sprung. I think that scene in The Shawshank Redemption, though he isn't released per se, may demonstrate it well. Once he craws out of the sewer and stands there, arms outstretched in the rain, there he knows freedom once again.
There is one experience that may rival getting out of prison. Being convicted, but getting some kind of reprieve and not having to go. Now that would be amazing. I can't imagine the relief a person would feel.
So, the only way I know to experience all this would be to get convicted and sent up the river. I'm just not sure what crime to commit. I may need some legal advice.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Coming Attractions
I hope to blog about the following topics in the near future:
Getting out of prison
Look for these new and exciting posts, all coming soon to this blog.
________
Getting out of prison
Look for these new and exciting posts, all coming soon to this blog.
________
Saturday, January 17, 2009
What's Wrong with AMC?
If the AMC still stands for American Movie Classics, then they got some guy like me over their categorizing the movies. Me and the AMC dude obviously have the same criteria a movie must meet in order to qualify as a classic.
1. Saw it once or twice.
2. Thought it was cool.
No longer do they play exclusively black and white films that we know we should appreciate, with stars that we know we should recognize. Instead, this weekend, for instance, you will see Terminator III, Rise of the Machines. Full color, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton.
That's not to say they won't reach further back in time. They recently aired Death Wish. This film may fall into a lot of categories, but American Movie Classic generally isn't one of them. That's a shame. Charles Bronson going around NYC, shooting up badies in revenge for the killing of his wife. It's a good thing they have the guy over at AMC picking the movies and not my humanities professor (or Christopher Guest).
A few weeks ago I was able to appreciate the Rocky films, all over again. The genius film decider played Rockys I-IV. Well, he also showed V, but not everyone's perfect. And I know he has some taste because I've yet to see The Godfather part III on AMC.
Alas, however, AMC isn't perfect. Last night while screening that veritable classic Commando, another Schwarzenegger joint, a film that falls short in a lot of ways, particularly with the original release coming so closely on the heels of the first Rambo movie, I was reminded of how flawed AMC can be.
First of all, commercials come at very regular intervals. This is a drag, because I just want to see Arnold come out of the shed and hack some soldier's arm off. Instead, I'm forced to sit through about 92 Enzyte ads, and if Enzyte did what they said it did, well, nevermind.
The other problem with AMC is the movies are edited into oblivion. The aforementioned arm hacking never happened, at least not in last night's version. What's up with that? Isn't that like wrapping a towel around Angelo's Michael? When I was a kid, maybe six or seven, I distinctly remember one of the killers in Death Wish spray painting the woman's hiny. Well, in the watered-down version the spray paint is there, some of the attack is there, but the derriere graffiti is gone. Come on! I expect that when I watch Raging Bull on PBS Joe Pesci will say "Freakin'" a lot, but this is basic cable, dude. You got to trust us to not let our 8 year old sons watch Michael Corleone consolidate his power.
Well, I shouldn't complain or be negative. I resolved to not do that this year, but this has been brewing for a while. All I know is, when I tune in to the next Godfather marathon, I better see Mo Green get shot right through the eyeball. If not, I'm pulling out my DVDs and skipping the Enzyte commercials.
1. Saw it once or twice.
2. Thought it was cool.
No longer do they play exclusively black and white films that we know we should appreciate, with stars that we know we should recognize. Instead, this weekend, for instance, you will see Terminator III, Rise of the Machines. Full color, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton.
That's not to say they won't reach further back in time. They recently aired Death Wish. This film may fall into a lot of categories, but American Movie Classic generally isn't one of them. That's a shame. Charles Bronson going around NYC, shooting up badies in revenge for the killing of his wife. It's a good thing they have the guy over at AMC picking the movies and not my humanities professor (or Christopher Guest).
A few weeks ago I was able to appreciate the Rocky films, all over again. The genius film decider played Rockys I-IV. Well, he also showed V, but not everyone's perfect. And I know he has some taste because I've yet to see The Godfather part III on AMC.
Alas, however, AMC isn't perfect. Last night while screening that veritable classic Commando, another Schwarzenegger joint, a film that falls short in a lot of ways, particularly with the original release coming so closely on the heels of the first Rambo movie, I was reminded of how flawed AMC can be.
First of all, commercials come at very regular intervals. This is a drag, because I just want to see Arnold come out of the shed and hack some soldier's arm off. Instead, I'm forced to sit through about 92 Enzyte ads, and if Enzyte did what they said it did, well, nevermind.
The other problem with AMC is the movies are edited into oblivion. The aforementioned arm hacking never happened, at least not in last night's version. What's up with that? Isn't that like wrapping a towel around Angelo's Michael? When I was a kid, maybe six or seven, I distinctly remember one of the killers in Death Wish spray painting the woman's hiny. Well, in the watered-down version the spray paint is there, some of the attack is there, but the derriere graffiti is gone. Come on! I expect that when I watch Raging Bull on PBS Joe Pesci will say "Freakin'" a lot, but this is basic cable, dude. You got to trust us to not let our 8 year old sons watch Michael Corleone consolidate his power.
Well, I shouldn't complain or be negative. I resolved to not do that this year, but this has been brewing for a while. All I know is, when I tune in to the next Godfather marathon, I better see Mo Green get shot right through the eyeball. If not, I'm pulling out my DVDs and skipping the Enzyte commercials.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Merry Christmas, Scrooge!
It's hard to live down a bad reputation. Just ask Scrooge. True, he lived a lot of life hating Christmas. He was a miserly old man who could hardly find the heart to give a day off to his employee. He wouldn't give to the poor, claiming his taxes already went to things like the debtor's prison. He even coined a phrase to express disgust with all things Christmas. Bah humbug!
But do you remember the joy Scrooge felt when he awoke and found that he hadn't missed Christmas? The first thing he did was buy the biggest Christmas goose for Cratchit's family. In short, there was a total transformation. He did not go into work that Christmas day. Instead, he got dressed up and attended his nephew's Christmas party. He even made donations to the poor, much to the surprise of the philanthropists. In fact, "Many laughed to see this alteration in him, but he let them laugh and little heeded them. His own heart laughed and that was quite enough for him. And it was always said of him that he knew how to keep Christmas well if any man alive possessed the knowledge."
So why do we still use "Scrooge" derisively? I say "Scrooge" is compliment, and a very fine one at that. May we all get to spend Christmas like Ebenezer Scrooge, giving gifts, helping the poor, celebrating with family and friends, and laughing in our hearts. It won't get better than that. God bless us all, everyone!
But do you remember the joy Scrooge felt when he awoke and found that he hadn't missed Christmas? The first thing he did was buy the biggest Christmas goose for Cratchit's family. In short, there was a total transformation. He did not go into work that Christmas day. Instead, he got dressed up and attended his nephew's Christmas party. He even made donations to the poor, much to the surprise of the philanthropists. In fact, "Many laughed to see this alteration in him, but he let them laugh and little heeded them. His own heart laughed and that was quite enough for him. And it was always said of him that he knew how to keep Christmas well if any man alive possessed the knowledge."
So why do we still use "Scrooge" derisively? I say "Scrooge" is compliment, and a very fine one at that. May we all get to spend Christmas like Ebenezer Scrooge, giving gifts, helping the poor, celebrating with family and friends, and laughing in our hearts. It won't get better than that. God bless us all, everyone!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Medicare is My Fave
One of my favorite things that Medicare does is, if you're patient comes to you from a skilled nursing facility, you have to determine...oh, nevermind, it's too
Should we really shoot for living forever? Or even 100? It's damn expensive to live that long. And if you're living that long with Medicare, you're doing it on the tax payers' dime. That doesn't seem American to me (let's not talk about Medicaid right now).
Don't get me wrong, I love it when my tax dollars go toward opening up highway 13 to four lanes all the way to Springfield. I even enjoy paying for state dinners at the white house when the queen comes to visit. But should we subsidize dotage? I say no thanks.
Whoa, I think I just solved the healthcare crisis-stop providing healthcare to anyone that has a disease that could potentially be their last. (Doc, can we call it common cold and not pancreatic cancer?)
Seriously though, it costs a lot of money to stay alive when you're sick, and that money has to come from somewhere. I guess the queen will have to get used to picnics on the mall.
Should we really shoot for living forever? Or even 100? It's damn expensive to live that long. And if you're living that long with Medicare, you're doing it on the tax payers' dime. That doesn't seem American to me (let's not talk about Medicaid right now).
Don't get me wrong, I love it when my tax dollars go toward opening up highway 13 to four lanes all the way to Springfield. I even enjoy paying for state dinners at the white house when the queen comes to visit. But should we subsidize dotage? I say no thanks.
Whoa, I think I just solved the healthcare crisis-stop providing healthcare to anyone that has a disease that could potentially be their last. (Doc, can we call it common cold and not pancreatic cancer?)
Seriously though, it costs a lot of money to stay alive when you're sick, and that money has to come from somewhere. I guess the queen will have to get used to picnics on the mall.
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